


Broken and Damned

by DeiaMatias



Series: The Phoenix Rises [1]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Episode: s04e02 Somebody's Been Reading Dante's Inferno, F/M, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Needs A Hug, Tissue Warning, Wingfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:02:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23672752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeiaMatias/pseuds/DeiaMatias
Summary: Lucifer and Chloe have a conversation after the events of Episode 4x02. Chloe gets something off her chest. Lucifer is not pleased.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Series: The Phoenix Rises [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1741381
Comments: 203
Kudos: 505





	1. Damned

**Author's Note:**

> Quarantine has given me free time! Since my days are no longer filled with writing memos and training manuals, I thought I'd try writing something a bit more fun. This has been floating around in my head since I first saw this episode. Be gentle, it's my first time.

As soon as other officers arrived on the set of The Cabin to arrest the murderer, Chloe disappeared from the scene. Lucifer watched her walk away towards the lake, worry pooling in his chest. Something was wrong. Something had been wrong since she’d returned from Europe. She’d held it in, pretended that everything was fine. But it wasn’t fine. She wasn’t fine. And tonight, it seemed that the part of her that was holding it all together broke apart.

He walked to the edge of the lake to see her sitting on a fallen tree near shore. Her head jerked up when she saw him come out of the woods. Tears were falling down her cheeks. “May I join you?” he asked.

Chloe nodded and scooted to the side of the tree to allow him room to sit. He walked closer, eyeing her seat suspiciously. It was filthy. “Well, I suppose my suit’s already ruined,” he huffed, sitting beside her on the tree.

She gave a little laugh and closed her eyes. More tears squeezed from her eyes. “Are you okay?” Lucifer asked her.

Chloe shook her head. Lucifer took a moment to look at her, to _really_ look at her. He could practically smell the guilt rolling off her in waves.

Well, he couldn’t have that. “Detective, I’d like to give you a bit of information. Something humans aren’t supposed to know. Insider trading, if you’d like.” He brushed a bit of dirt off the leg of his pants. “I feel I would be failing you as a partner if I didn’t tell you what determines if a soul goes to Heaven or Hell.”

Chloe stiffened at that, turning her face towards him, fear in her eyes.

Lucifer raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. “Not as a threat! I don’t even have any say in the process. Neither does my father for that matter. You lot determine that on your own. I’m telling you this so that you _don’t_ wind up in Hell.”

Chloe gave a little gulp, “But… shouldn’t you…. _want_ …?”

Lucifer stiffened. “Of course not! I don’t even want to be there and I rule the place. Well, used to anyway. I’m retired now. But I certainly don’t want to see you suffer.”

Chloe turned away from him, her gaze growing distant. “I might deserve it,” she whispered.

 _Oh,_ Lucifer thought, _we need to fix this right now._

“You most certainly do not. Which is why I’m telling you this. Dad forbid you drive out of here and get hit by a bus or something. It’s guilt, Detective. Guilt is what drives a soul to Hell. Not sin. You could sleep with every man and woman in Los Angeles and still wind up in Heaven if you didn’t feel guilt about it. Well, unless you’re me, of course. And it’s not little guilt. Not ‘Oh no! I got too much change back from the grocers and didn’t return it!’ Real guilt. So, my question for you is this, Detective. Why do you feel so guilty?”

Chloe stood up and took a few steps towards the lake, the water lapping at the toes of her shoes. She felt the Devil’s eyes on her back, and realized that she’d done this to herself. The being behind her had always looked out for her, and continued to do so now. That’s why she’d damned herself. Because it didn’t matter if he was the devil. He was her friend, and she came within millimeters of betraying him. She’d planned to do so. Had almost executed it. Executed _him._ And she would have done so if not for a slip of her hand. She made him vulnerable, and still he stayed around her. He looked out for her, even though it put him at risk.

She didn’t deserve him. And he deserved someone better than her. 

Chloe turned back around, suddenly comfortable in her realization. This was right. This was what she deserved. She walked up to him, took a breath, and put her hand on the Devil’s cheek. “I’m so sorry that I couldn’t be better. I wish,” she paused, gulping in a breath. “I wish I’d been stronger. Thank you for telling me.” She leaned over, and put a kiss on his forehead. As she turned to leave, she felt his hand wrap around her wrist.

She tugged away. She might as well be trying to pull her wrist from a statue. “Let me go, Lucifer.”

“No.”

Chloe felt panic rising up in her throat. Accepting her fate was one thing. Having to explain it was another.

She tugged again. “Lucifer, please let me go.”

“What just happened, Detective?”

“Lucifer!”

“Why do you feel guilty?”

“Let go of my arm!”

A look of comprehension suddenly flashed through his eyes. “What happened in Europe?”

Chloe froze, panic in her face. Lucifer let go of her arm. She debated on bolting, but realized that she probably wouldn’t get far with the Devil on her heels. “Please sit back down, Detective.”

Lucifer patted the log next to him. Taking a breath, Chloe sat beside him.

Silence sat between them, heavy as a stone.

Lucifer sighed and began to speak, gazing at his hands. “When a soul goes to Hell, they’re forced to relive the worst time in their life, over and over again. I don’t torture them with whips and chains for the most part. The soul decides its own punishment. And they relive it forever. It’s called a Hell loop. What would happen in your loop, Detective?”

“My hand wouldn’t slip,” she whispered. If Lucifer had the hearing of a normal human, he wouldn’t have heard her. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small vial. “I went to Rome. Met a priest.”

Lucifer pulled a small gasp of breath in through his teeth. “And this priest told you that the Devil was a monster.”

Chloe nodded, rolling the vial between her fingers. “I was so scared. And this priest,” she gave a shudder, “he seemed like he had all the answers. And I forgot, Lucifer. I’m so sorry, but I forgot.”

“Forgot what?”

“I was so mad at you. That night on the balcony, I thought that we finally connected. I felt like all the rest of it fell away, and I was ready. I was ready to take the next step. I wanted to. I wanted _you_. And then I found out. I know you didn’t lie to me, but it felt like you did. And suddenly, I went from falling for my slightly odd partner, to falling for the Devil. And it,” she gave a little sob, “it tore me apart. That was the worst part, you know. That you deceived me. And I was scared, and I was mad. And I forgot who you were. I forgot how much you’d been hurt, how broken you were. I forgot how you made my life brighter. How everything in my life was better because you were in it. And I forgot how you sometimes looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen. I forgot how you’d always taken care of me. I was angry and scared and I forgot.” She handed him the vial. “Please take this from me.”

Lucifer took the vial from her hands. He had a feeling where this was going, and he didn’t like it. “What is this, Detective?”

Chloe let out a small sob. “The priest. He said that death and destruction followed you. He had ‘proof.’” she made air quotes. “It was all bullshit. I see that now. But, at the time, it made sense. He wanted me to put this in your drink. He said that it was the only way I’d be safe. That Trixie would be safe. That the world would be safe.”

“Safe from me?”

Chloe nodded. More tears came out of her eyes. “He said it would send you back to Hell. I was so stupid,” she said between tears.

“I’d say so, yes,” Lucifer said, anger rising in his voice. “Were you going to give this to me tonight?”

She nodded again. “You went into the other room. I had it out, but the music startled me. My hand slipped. So, _when_ I go to Hell, my loop will be that moment, over and over again. But my hand won’t slip. And I’d hurt you. And I wouldn’t be able to take it back.”

Lucifer stood then. He shoved the wretched vial in his pocket. “Who is this priest?”

“Father Kinley.”

“Is he still in Rome?”

“No, he’s in Los Angeles. He was supposed to meet me in your penthouse after I gave you the vial to perform some kind of ritual.”

“To send me to Hell?”

Lucifer heard her give a little sob.

“Detective! Answer me!” He whipped around and pulled her to her feet. He felt his eyes flash red and saw her shake in fear. “Answer me,” he said, deathly calm now.

“Yes,” she whispered, her eyes wide like a startled deer. He released her and stalked away again, trying to calm himself. He heard a thud behind him and whipped back towards her. Chloe was on her knees. And, as angry as he was, it still broke him a little bit to see this strong woman on his knees before him, broken and torn, and yes, at this moment, condemned to Hell.

“What changed your mind?” He said, as softly as he could manage.

“I make you vulnerable. And you stayed with me anyway.”

“And why do you think I stay by your side, Detective? Why do you think I’ve spent the last three years standing next to the only person who could hurt me?”

She closed her eyes. “Because you loved me.”

“Yes. For the first time in millenia, I allowed someone in. Everyone turned their back on me, my siblings, my mother, my father. They threw me to Hell, like I was trash. I finally allowed myself to _feel_ for someone again. And you want to send me to Hell too. This is what I get, I suppose, for thinking that you might be better than them.”

“Lucifer,” she said, still staring at the ground in front of her. “I know I have no right to ask you for anything right now…”

“You’re right.”

“...but please. There’s people out there who are better than me. Someone out there deserves you. Someone out there deserves the light that you bring to everyone around you. I hope you find that person someday. And I hope that you’ll let them in. Please, Lucifer, please let them in.”

Lucifer felt his own sob rise to his throat. “I wanted it to be you.”

Chloe looked up at him, giving him a small smile. “I did too.”

And, for a moment, their eyes locked, and their connection was still there. Not the Devil and the Detective, but two people, broken and in pain. Two damned souls, desperately clinging onto the last shreds of their salvation. Lucifer reached his hand down to her. She took it and he pulled her to her feet. “I should go,” she whispered. Chloe stood on her tiptoes and planted a small kiss on his cheek. “I’m sorry. Take care of yourself, Lucifer. Be happy.”

She took a breath and prepared to walk away from him for the last time.

Then her phone rang.


	2. Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Misplaced anger is NOT a good coping mechanism.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Additional angst before the main show. Had to add a chapter here. Turns out Chloe and Lucifer had a few more things they needed to hash out before it all hits the fan.

Chloe's phone rang.

She reached into her pocket, saw the name on the caller ID, and put it back in her pocket.

"Who was that, Detective?" Lucifer asked.

"Kinley."

"Don't want to talk to your co-conspirator?"

"I should have never talked to him in the first place.”

“Suddenly! She’s back to being a detective again!”

Chloe took a breath through her nose and out through her mouth, a pained look coming back onto her face. Her phone rang again.

“Go ahead. Answer it.”

Chloe squeezed her eyes shut. “I don’t want to.”

“Detective, answer the phone,” Lucifer commanded. 

Chloe’s eyes snapped up to him, and she saw the Archangel. She saw the King of Hell. As much as she feared talking to Kinley, she feared telling him ‘no’ even more. Hands shaking, she took her phone out of her pocket. It took her two tries to answer.

“Detective Decker, I was worried when I didn’t hear from you.” Chloe’s skin crawled at hearing Kinley’s voice.

“I’m okay,” she said.

“And the Devil?”

“He’s okay too.”

Kinley sighed. “Second thoughts again, Detective Decker? He is the Prince of Lies. The Devil. Whatever he may seem to you, it’s just an act. You know this, Chloe. You need to be strong. God wants you to send him back to Hell. Only you can do it.”

“I can’t.”

“Yes you can, Chloe. God is on your side.”

Chloe looked at her former partner. He stood strong, tall, and angry, but deep in his eyes, she could see the lost little boy who felt that he couldn’t be loved. Suddenly, she was angry. She didn’t deserve Lucifer. But, for her last act for the man she was almost allowed to love, she would fucking fix this. “Can I see you this evening?”

“Of course, Chloe. Where would you like to meet?”

Chloe rattled off the directions to the bluff that had seen the end of Charlotte Richard’s life. “One hour.”

“I’ll see you soon.”

Chloe hung up her phone and pulled her sidearm out of its holster at her hip. She checked to make sure she had several rounds left and put it back.

“What are you doing, Detective?” Lucifer asked.

“Fixing this.” She began to walk off to her car.

“Fixing what?” He said, grabbing her and turning her back towards him.

“He wants you dead, Lucifer. If I tell him no, he’ll find another way.”

“So you’re going to shoot him?”

“If I’m going to Hell already, I might as well go for something good.”

“Detective!” He still hated the idea of her ending up in Hell.

Chloe jerked away from him. “Goodbye, Lucifer.”

Lucifer let her get ten paces away from him before making up his mind. “I’m going with you.”

“No, you’re not,” Chloe said, still walking.

“Yes I am.”

Chloe stopped so fast Lucifer almost ran into her. “No, Lucifer, you’re not. This is MY mess! I got you into this and I’m going to fix it! You’re vulnerable around me. He could hurt you.”

“You’re vulnerable all the time.”

“Why the hell would you even care what happens to me, Lucifer! I betrayed you, I almost killed you. Go. Home.”

Lucifer stopped short. She was right. He _shouldn’t_ care. But he still did, damnit. “I’m not going to be the one to tell your daughter that you’re dead. Not when I could have stopped it.” He grabbed her chin and pulled her gaze up to his. He brought Hellfire into his eyes. “You can’t stop me, Detective.”

Chloe lost herself in his eyes. _This is what’s waiting for me,_ she thought. But she wasn’t afraid. She threw him away. She deserved to burn. But she couldn’t deny him. Not at the end.

“I’m driving.” Chloe pulled away from him and stalked away. 

*****

The drive started out silent. Chloe was glad. She couldn’t think of anything to say to him that she hadn’t already said. This would be the last time she saw him, she knew it. At least while she still drew breath. Kinley was dangerous. It wouldn’t surprise her if he came armed. Chloe wouldn’t let him hurt Lucifer. She would save him. No matter what. She owed him. 

And, when she died, she would pay for her sins. Forever.

“I missed you while you were gone, Detective.” Lucifer broke the silence.

Chloe tightened her grip on the steering wheel.

“I feel like I owe you a bit of an apology.”

“You don’t owe me anything, Lucifer”

“They say confession is good for the soul, Detective.” Lucifer didn’t know why he felt the urge to unburden himself to her. But a big part of him felt like this was his last chance. He wanted to say his piece. “I should have had Doctor Martin reach out to you.”

“Your therapist knows?”

Lucifer made an affirmative noise. “She offered to speak with you after you left. But, Linda is my friend and she can be very… persuasive when she wants to be. I didn’t want her to influence your choice. So I told her not to contact you. Maybe that was a mistake. Maybe things could have been different.” _Maybe that would have saved your soul,_ he thought.

“I’m glad you have her. I’m glad you’ve got someone to tell you that you deserve to be loved.”

Lucifer gave an unhappy laugh. “But do I, Detective? I don’t think that’s in the cards for me. My own father couldn’t love me, so why would anyone else?”

“Lucifer….”

“He made you, you know.”

“What?”

“My father. He made you. You wouldn’t even exist if he hadn’t meddled. You’re a miracle,” he said, sarcasm dripping from his voice. “I was livid when I found out. Angry at my dad. Angry that he apparently designed you to run into me. I tried to remove myself from your life when I found out, but I couldn’t stay away.”

“Candy?” Chloe asked.

Lucifer nodded. “But why did he make you? Was it to make me bleed so that I could die? Was it his twisted form of love connection? There were even a few moments in there that I thought you might be his odd form of an apology. I can’t say that I’m terribly surprised to find out there was an even more painful option. He created you to prove that I am such a wretched thing that no one will be able to love me. Even when I give you everything. So, no, Detective. Apparently I don’t deserve to be loved. God has decided.” 

Chloe swerved off the road into an empty parking lot. She jerked the car to a stop and lept out the door. Lucifer watched as she retched onto the concrete.

Damnit, part of him wanted to hold her hair back for her.

But a bigger part of him enjoyed her misery. He was, after all, a torturer. That was apparently all he was good for.

Chloe continued to dry heave. He heard sobs ripping from his throat.

Damnit, damnit damnit, he hated seeing her hurt. 

She stood up and walked a few steps away from the car before falling to her knees again. Her body continued to try to expel the non-existent contents of her stomach.

“Damnit,” Lucifer muttered as he opened his car door. He kneeled on the concrete in front of her. 

“Go away, Lucifer.”

“Where are you going, Detective?”

“Hell, apparently.”

“Well, you’re not going there tonight.”

“AND WHY SHOULDN’T I?” She yelled. “What good am I even doing here? I was apparently created for one purpose: to bring you pain! What if that’s all I’m good for?”

“Your urchin loves you.”

“And what if I end up doing to her what I did to you? Apparently I’m self-righteous and judgemental! What happens when she becomes a teenager and starts to rebel? I’m rotten, Lucifer! And, I’m sure the priest will claim that I’m evil or bewitched or stupid when he sees me show up with you,” Chloe ran her fingers through her hair, dislodging strands from her ponytail. “I need to fix this for you. Then it doesn’t matter what happens to me.” She shoved past him and headed back towards her car. As she went to open her door, a long fingered hand with a black stoned ring slammed down in front of her, keeping the door closed. As she turned around, Lucifer’s other hand slammed down on her other side, trapping her in.

“No, Detective. You don’t get to do that. You are standing here with the Devil. The most singularly evil being to ever walk through my father’s reality. You do _not_ get to be the bad one here. That is me, and me alone. Your damnation is on _me._ Your pain is on _me!_ I will carry this forever. Without me, you never would have walked this earth, and you never would have to be staring down the barrel of an eternity in Hell.”

She pushed against his arms. “Fuck you, Lucifer. You’re not evil. And my choices are on me, not you. I chose to allow myself to be brainwashed by that asshole of a priest, not you. You don’t get to hold my guilt. It’s MINE. Let me go..” She shoved against his arms again. “LET ME GO, LUCIFER!”

But Lucifer had frozen. “The priest…” he said, under his breath.

He barely felt it when Chloe shoved him again. “Let me go,” she whimpered.

“A man of God…” he whispered. “A man of _God_ led you to damnation, Chloe.” He removed his right hand from the car and stroked one long finger down her cheek. She was caught in his gaze as she watched the anger build in the Devil’s eyes. “It wouldn’t be the first time my father set a priest in front of me to teach me a lesson. And you’re the casualty.” He stroked her cheek again. “He forfeited your soul to bring me pain, and he used this priest to do it.” Cold, raw anger burned in his eyes. Menace radiated out from his very pores.

Chloe felt fear snake through her veins. “You think that…. your father…”

“Yesss,” Lucifer purred. He took the hand off her cheek and placed it on her chin. “Yes, Detective. The priest is a pawn, just as you are. Put here to punish me because dear old Dad didn’t like it when I told him ‘no.’ You have to hand it to the bastard. His punishment impresses even the Devil. The priest isn’t yours to punish, Detective. He’s mine.” 

Chloe began to tremble. “Lucifer….”

“It’s time for the Devil to get his due, Detective.” Lucifer grabbed her by her arm, walked her around to the other side of the car and shoved her into the passenger seat. Faster than she thought possible, the Devil sat down in the driver’s seat and tore off towards the hills overlooking the city.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all your kind comments! I am THRILLED beyond belief that people have enjoyed this story. It's a wonderful feeling to let my hair down and write for fun.


	3. Destroyed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer and Chloe have a little chat with Father Kinley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started writing this story thinking that it would be easy. I mean, I had the whole thing in my head, so it was just a matter of writing it down. And this chapter should have been especially easy, because this is the one that's been inside my brain since I first watched season 4. I should be able to knock this chapter out in a couple of hours, max, right? Granted, it'd been almost 20 years since I'd attempted to write fiction, but a huge part of my job involves writing. A little short story should be no problem, right? Heh, yeah, not so much.
> 
> So I'd like to take this moment to give a big giant KUDOS to all the wonderful authors writing for the Lucifer fandom. I am in awe of the magnificent work you do, more now than ever. Thank you for all the entertainment!

Chloe had never been so scared in her life.

She wasn’t afraid of the being that sat beside her. Despite all the anger that he’d thrown at her in the past couple of hours, she knew, in the marrow of her bones that the Devil wouldn’t hurt her. He was furious with her. And she knew that she would never see him again after tonight. But she wasn’t afraid of him.

She was afraid _for_ him. 

Chloe flashed back to the scene in the loft. Lucifer burnt, flayed, red. He’d just killed a man. For the first time ever. Chloe was a cop. She knew what that does to a person. Hell, she’d gone through it herself, and she’d been trained. 

And, to be perfectly honest, she was a lot more emotionally stable than Lucifer was.

Lucifer was livid. For some reason, his anger towards her had shifted. Now it seemed to be directed mostly towards his father, who was untouchable, but Kinley wasn’t. And Lucifer seemed to think that Kinley was sent by his father.

 _Lucifer can’t kill Kinley,_ Chloe thought, _but I can._ Chloe could kill the priest. The damage it would do to her soul paled in comparison to the damage she’d already inflicted on herself. She could not let Lucifer take that burden.

Chloe had to protect him from himself, if it was the last thing she ever did.

Lucifer pulled to a stop. Standing in the headlights of Chloe’s car, was Father Kinley. Without a word or a glance towards Chloe, Lucifer got out of the car, his movements dripping with supernatural grace and power. Chloe checked her sidearm and went to stand beside the Devil.

A spark of fear flashed through Kinley’s eyes.

“Father Kinley, I think you should meet the person you wanted to send to hell,” Chloe said, cold anger in her voice.

Kinley crossed himself. “My child, what has the Devil done to your soul?”

Lucifer gave a small snort and lit a cigarette. “You priests. You really have no clue how it all works, do you? I didn’t do anything to her soul, but you certainly did. What gets you into Heaven, Padre? Hmm? What gets you into Hell?”

“Faith in the one true God will save you from…”

Lucifer gave a laugh and stomped out the cigarette. “Idiot. Faith in my father has nothing to do with it. Do you have any idea how many holy men I’ve got locked in cells? And, oh do I love their screams.” Lucifer’s voice was like ice, even as he continued to smile. “They spend centuries wondering why their _God_ has forsaken them.”

“You tempted them…”

“I did nothing of the sort. Oh, but you lot. You’ve sent so many souls to me. Your priests fondle little boys and then burden their souls with guilt for ‘leading the priests to temptation.’ Does a person not tithe enough? Let’s pile on the guilt. Not enough prayers? More guilt. Don’t spend enough time in your pews? More guilt. The church has condemned more people to hell than it’s saved, including the woman beside me.”

“I tried to save her from _you!_ ”

“DO NOT SPEAK OF THINGS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!” Fire ripped from Lucifer’s skin. It cracked and burned, turning him red and raw. 

Kinley fell to his knees, prayers bursting from his lips.

Chloe brushed a hand across Lucifer’s elbow. She gave him a look like she had so many times before. It was a look that said, _Back down, Lucifer, I’ve got this._ It was so wonderfully normal. And, just like he would have done with any other suspect, he stepped back and let her take the lead. 

She knelt in front of the priest. “What makes you so arrogant to think that you could know more about the afterlife than the Devil?”

“God is on my side.”

Chloe shrugged. “Maybe. But, take it from a lifelong atheist. If you’re waiting on God to come and save you from the mess you’re in, you’re going to be waiting for a long time.” 

“Sinner,” the priest said, a demented grin spreading across his face. “You would let this monster defile your flesh? You would let the root of all evil warp your soul? You would let Satan corrupt your child? What has the Devil offered you that is so tempting that you would throw your own child to Hell? Why have you turned your back on the Lord?”

Chloe gave a little laugh. “God made me, you know. He made me for the Devil. Lucifer thinks that his father made me in order to hurt him. Maybe he’s right. By all accounts, Lucifer’s dad seems like an asshole. He lets people starve while others throw away food. God lets people make themselves wealthy off the suffering and death of others, and, if those pricks have their butts in the pews on Sunday morning, they’re considered ‘good’ and 'holy' even though they cause others pain. Every day, I see horrible things that people do to each other and God just lets it happen. And, if all that weren’t enough, God might just be the worst parent to ever exist. What kind of ‘loving’ god would throw his own son away? Lucifer suffered for years! _Alone!_ And I tried to help him heal, God knows I tried.” Chloe put her head down in shame, and took a ragged breath. “But I wasn’t strong enough, not when it counted. And, I don’t know if God put you in my path or not, but if he did,” Chloe lifted her eyes and glared at the priest, “then God’s a dick.”

Lucifer felt a little grin pull at the corners of his burnt mouth at the end of Chloe’s rant. He was still mad at her. Furious in fact. But that fire, that passion! The anger that she showed on his behalf. It almost made him remember why he’d found her so enchanting.

He put his hand on Chloe’s shoulder. “Detective, step away from him.” Chloe looked up at the Devil and, without showing any fear, put her hand in his. His heart gave a little leap. Lucifer pulled her gently to her feet and put himself between her and the priest.

“Why her?” Lucifer asked. “Why did you choose her?”

“You should ask her why she chose me. She was the one who came to the Church looking for information about the Devil,” Kinley said with a grin.

Lucifer felt the softness that had begun warm his heart turn to ice. The priest was right. _The Detective_ went to Rome first. The priest didn’t come looking for her. He turned slowly to the mortal woman behind him. The woman he had almost allowed himself to love. “Why?” He tried to pull his hand away from her, but she tightened her grip.

Chloe looked into the Devil’s glowing eyes. “I’ve seen you throw men through walls. I’ve seen you reduce suspects to insanity. You completely lack impulse control. You’re hedonistic and self-centered. But, to me, you were always… my partner. Kind, generous, fun. I didn’t know if you presented yourself a certain way to lure me in, or to trick me. I didn’t know! I know almost nothing about religion, you know this. I wanted an independent source.”

Lucifer ripped his hand from hers. “And you chose the _Vatican?_ These idiotic priests don’t know the first thing about the way things work. Why didn’t you just come to me?”

 _“Because I didn’t know if I could trust you!”_ Chloe yelled. “And you know, Lucifer, you were perfectly capable of calling me yourself! You could have called me at any time, but you didn’t. I walked down those stairs, and you looked… you looked like the Devil. And you were standing over Pierce’s corpse. You changed back, and without saying a word to me, you just left the scene the moment everyone else showed up! I tried looking for you, but you had disappeared. I had internal affairs grilling me for _hours,_ and no one could find you! I went by the penthouse once they were done with me. Lucifer, I had never been as scared as I was during that elevator ride. Here I was, going to the Devil’s home, knowingly, willingly. It felt like I had gone insane. But, you were also my partner, and you’d always had my back. I wanted an explanation, and I wanted it from _you_ .” She stopped catching her breath. Lucifer’s red eyes were wide with shock. “But you weren’t there. So, what was I to think? That my emotionally stunted partner buried himself in a bottle somewhere, or that the Devil was trying to rework some bizarre evil scheme now that he’d been exposed? _I had no idea_. You weren’t picking up your phone, and the longer I went without hearing from you, the more I thought the ‘evil scheme’ thing seemed more likely. So I ran. I took my daughter and ran. I hoped to find answers, but all I found was this asshole...” Chloe turned and pointed to the spot where Kinley had been seconds before. “Lucifer, Kinley’s gone.”

Lucifer turned to where Kinley had been as Chloe pulled her sidearm out of her holster. She removed the safety and scanned the trees. 

“Detective…”

“Shhhh,” she whispered, listening for movement.

“You’re right, I should have called you.”

“We’ll talk about it later, Lucifer," she grumbled.

And, at that moment, Chloe saw a flash of metal emerge from behind a tree. _He’s got a gun!_ She fired off a shot, aiming for the only bit of Kinley she could see, but it hit the tree, sending off a shower of bark. “GET DOWN!” she screamed, stepping in front of Lucifer. Her finger was on the trigger when she felt the bullet enter her, only a few inches from where Jimmy Barnes had scarred her flesh on her first case with Lucifer.

She collapsed back into his arms, “DETECTIVE!” she heard him yell. But her focus was on the figure walking towards them.

Somehow, Chloe had managed to hold onto her gun. She raised her arm, aimed, and shot.

Father Kinley fell to the earth and was still.

 _Lucifer is safe. We won._ Chloe’s eyes slid shut, a smile on her face.

“DETECTIVE!” Lucifer’s voice roused her. She looked up to see warm brown eyes. _He is so beautiful._

“Why did you step in front of me? Why, Chloe?” Chloe felt a wince of pain as his hands pressed on her wound in an attempt to slow the bleeding.

She reached up and put her hand on the side of his face. “And I’d do it again. And again. Don’t you know that, Lucifer?” She smiled at him. “Look after Trixie, please.”

“Look after her yourself. You’ll be fine, Detective.”

Her brows pinched when she saw his tears. “Don’t cry for me, Lucifer. You deserve so much better than me. Will you be able to come and find me? After I’m gone?”

 _She can’t go to Hell,_ Lucifer thought. _And my feathers won’t work on a human._ His breath caught as an idea sprung to his mind. One word that could save her. _Miracle._ He manifested his wings and pulled a feather.

Her eyes practically glowed at the sight of them. “Lucifer,” she whispered, “you’re beautiful.”

“Never mind that,” Lucifer shoved the feather onto her wound.

Nothing happened.

Lucifer pulled another feather and placed it beside the first.

Still nothing.

He couldn’t heal her. 

He squeezed his eyes shut and pulled her close. “I’m so sorry, Chloe.”

“Shhh,” she said, “it’s okay. And, for whatever it’s worth, Lucifer, I love you. I have for a long time. Please be happy.”

 _Maybe I can still save her soul._ “Chloe, listen to me.” She had grown still. “CHLOE!” 

“Yeah,” she whispered.

“Look at me! Chloe, this is so important.”

“Okay.”

“Chloe, you were right. I made a mess of the whole thing. What happened isn’t your fault. I forgive you. Please, Chloe, _please_ forgive yourself. Be at peace, Chloe. Please. Please go to Heaven.”

 _How can I tell him ‘no’ here at the end?_ Chloe nodded, and gave him one last smile.

The last thing she saw was his deep brown eyes.


	4. Held

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Devil goes to Heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things I suck at: Gauging how many chapters are in my story. 
> 
> This is a short(ish) one, because I hit a good stopping point and couldn't resist digging the knife in One. More. Time. The next chapter is about 75% written and 100% drafted. It will be out in the next day or two.

The Archangel Lucifer wept.

Azrael, the Angel of Death, watched her older brother cling to the mortal woman as she breathed her last. Azrael felt the moment when the woman's soul broke free of her body.

Lucifer felt it too.

He gently laid the shell that had contained Chloe Decker on the earth and pulled her soul into his arms, cradling it like it was the most precious thing in the universe.

Azrael knelt in front of her brother. She reached out to Chloe's soul. "She's right on the edge, Lucifer. She could go either way. Her guilt is strong, but she died in peace."

"She doesn't deserve Hell."

Azrael agreed, but it wasn't her place to make these kinds of decisions. 

Chloe's soul looked the same as her body. She appeared to be sleeping and would remain so until her soul crossed the threshold to either Heaven or Hell.

"Azrael, I'm taking her to the gates." 

The Devil spread his wings, and lifted off towards the place that had been denied to him for millennia.

"Crap," Azrael muttered. "Crap crap crap." Azrael shot off a quick prayer to Amenadiel and took off after her brother.

*****

Lucifer breached the threshold that separated Earth from the Celestial Realm, Azrael right behind him. Amenadiel was waiting for them.

"Don't try to stop me, brother," Lucifer said, letting his eyes flash red.

Amenadiel shook his head. "May I fly beside you?"

Wide eyed with surprise, Lucifer nodded. With a powerful wing beat, he resumed his journey towards the gates, Chloe's soul in his arms, flanked by the Angel of Death and the Firstborn.

Chloe deserved a procession. She deserved a bloody parade.

The gates appeared in the distance. Lucifer faltered momentarily. It had been so long since he’d seen them. Azrael came up beside him. “It’s okay, Luci. We’re right here.”

Lucifer looked down at the soul he carried in his arms. He could do this. With renewed vigor, he pushed on towards the gates.

For Chloe.

As he flew, he thought how strange his day had been. 24 hours ago he had been blown up by a reality show contestant. 18 hours ago, the Detective had agreed to a date, even though he now knew it had been a ploy. 6 hours ago, she had almost poisoned him. 3 hours ago, he was convinced that he never wanted to see her again after he learned what she had done.

And now? Now he would give anything to tell her that he loved her. Now he was about to demand to see his father for the first time in millennia to beg for the soul of the woman in his arms. His miracle.

The gates were huge. They extended in a golden barrier that stretched from horizon to horizon. Lucifer landed where he knew there was a seam in their rigid structure.

The last time he’d stood at this spot, he’d been bound. He fell. 

“FATHER!” he yelled. “I DEMAND AN AUDIENCE TO PLEAD FOR THE SOUL OF CHLOE DECKER!”

The gates stayed closed.

Lucifer shifted the weight of Chloe’s legs to his wing to free his right arm. He knocked on the gate. “FATHER!”

The gates cracked open.

“Son, I understand the strain you’re under, but that’s no reason to forget common courtesy.”

Lucifer felt his jaw tighten. _The smug bastard._ He looked down at the sleeping woman in his arms, swallowed his pride and got down on his knees. “Please, Father. She has guilt, but she doesn’t deserve to suffer for an eternity because of it. I made so many mistakes. Mistakes that led her to making the choices she made. Please allow her in. She shouldn’t suffer because of me.”

God let a moment pass in silence. “It is not my place to judge souls, Samael. Nor is it yours. You know this. It is up to the humans themselves to decide where they should go. Chloe Decker found peace in saving your life, this is true. But her guilt weighs her down. She feels that she deserves to suffer for what she did to you.”

“She gave her life. That’s more than I ever would have asked. Her daughter will grow up without a mother, with only a douche of a father. Please let me tell Beatrice Espinoza that her mother is waiting for her in heaven.”

The edge of God’s mouth twitched. “Beatrice has a lovely soul.”

“Sticky fingered, devious little urchin…” Lucifer grumbled.

“You care for the child,” God said. It wasn’t a question. Lucifer didn’t deny it. “You will be able to assist in her upbringing. In fact, her mother requested that you look after her, did she not?”

“She did. And I will abide by her wishes.”

God sighed. “This woman has wronged you, Samael. She planned to throw you away out of fear. Why do you care what happens to her soul? Why did you offer her forgiveness at the end?”

Lucifer looked down at Chloe’s sleeping form. He remembered her in a pink sweater, surrounded by golden confetti. He remembered the way she looked at him when she saved Lux, not because she had to, but because she wanted to. He remembered the pain in her eyes when he showed up with Candy. He remembered the broken look on her face after he tried to one-up Pierce. And still she came to him. _No you’re not,_ she’d said, _Not to me._ And tonight, when she’d realized that she’d been wrong, she came to his defense. She’d taken a bullet for him. She’d said that she loved him.

Lucifer’s breath hitched. “She made mistakes. But, so have I. We were both idiots and we managed to ruin our chance. But I love her. And she loves me. I want her to be happy.”

God nodded. “Rise, Lightbringer.”

Lucifer came to his feet, careful not to jostle Chloe. When he finally tore his gaze away from her face, he saw a man standing beside his father with a scowl on his face.

The man reared back and punched Lucifer in the jaw. “That’s for making my baby cry, you idiot.”

“Bloody Hell, that hurt!” he yelled, gaping slack jawed at the mortal soul standing in front of him. 

The man then held out his right hand. Lucifer stared at it, and cautiously shifted Chloe’s weight back to his wing so that he could take the man’s hand. “And that’s for having her back.”

Lucifer narrowed his eyes. “John Decker?”

John nodded.

Lucifer shook his hand with enthusiasm now. “Sir, it’s an absolute honor to meet you. You daughter spoke most highly of you.”

Amenadiel leaned over and whispered to Azrael, “Did Lucifer just call him, _‘sir?’”_

Azrael snickered. “Guess that’s what you’re supposed to do when you meet your girlfriend’s father.”

God cleared his throat. All three of his children’s eyes snapped back to him. “Samael, I wish to have a conversation with Chloe Decker. Let her pass through the gates.”

Lucifer tightened his grip around Chloe. “She doesn’t deserve Hell.”

God sighed, “That is for her to decide, Samael. You know that. Wait here. I will come back and tell you the fate of her soul. You have my word.”

As much as Lucifer despised his father, his word was, quite literally, Law. He nodded, his gaze returning to Chloe’s face. A cold shiver passed through his body. This quite possibly would be the last time he ever saw her. He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “I love you,” he whispered, hoping with all his heart that somehow she would hear his words. “I don’t want her to be alone,” he said, his voice catching.

John placed a hand on Lucifer’s shoulder. “Let me take my daughter, Lucifer. I’ll take care of her.” Lucifer looked up at John, tears glistening in his eyes. He nodded, gently placing Chloe in her father’s arms. John gave him a small smile and turned towards the gate.

God passed through the gate first, John and Chloe right behind him. Lucifer had one last look at Chloe’s face, sleeping in her father’s tender grasp. Then the gates closed, and Chloe was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tired of angst and pain? We're turning a corner soon, I promise. Okay, there will still be angst, just... well, less angsty-angst.


	5. Remade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God likes to monologue. Chloe makes a choice.

The first thing Chloe saw was deep brown eyes.

At first she thought she was gazing at Lucifer, but then she took a closer look at the face surrounding the eyes that so closely matched her partner’s.

The man had the same proud nose as Lucifer. But instead of artfully maintained stubble, he had a short beard, shot through with gray. Chloe blinked, clearing the sleep from her eyes.

“God?” she asked.

The man nodded.

She felt a petulant glare form on her face. “I’m not going to apologize for calling you a dick.”

God laughed at that. “Oh I did well making you, Chloe Decker. You were absolutely perfect for my son.”

Chloe looked away in shame. “No. I wasn’t strong enough. I wasn’t good enough for him. He deserved better than me.”

“He thinks you deserved better than him,” God said, giving her a small smile.

Chloe shook her head. “No, he was perfect. I was just too blind to see it.” She glanced around, taking in the room. She was reclining on a couch in the middle of a sunken seating area. The room was large, with delicate staircases reaching towards the ceiling. Every inch was covered in books and what looked like half-finished projects. “I thought I was going to Hell. Why am I here?”

“You lied to Samael at the end. I wondered about that.”

“Samael?”

God shook his head with a smile. “My apologies, Detective Decker. He calls himself Lucifer now.”

“What do you mean, I lied to him at the end?”

“Don’t you remember? He asked you to go to Heaven. You nodded.”

Chloe closed her eyes, the memory of her final moments springing to her mind. “I couldn’t hurt him again. He wanted me in Heaven.”

“He would have found out, you know.”

Tears sprang to her eyes as guilt flooded her system. It felt like a rock, weighing her down, pulling her to the Hell she knew she deserved. “So, even in death, I can’t protect him. Why am I here? I don’t belong here.”

God stood and walked away from her. “I wanted to meet you, Detective Decker. Maybe even give you an argument that might change your mind.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want my son to be in pain either.”

Chloe’s eyes narrowed in anger. “Says the person who threw him into Hell. Do you know how much that screwed him up? How much he still hurts, even now, because his daddy didn’t love him?”

“I loved him.”

“And you threw him away.”

God turned back to her. “So did you.”

Chloe looked away, her anger melting away, and her guilt coming back in force. “I made a mistake,” she whispered.

God nodded. “I did as well.”

“You’re God. Aren’t you supposed to be perfect?”

“If I were perfect, I would have found a more elegant solution for Samael. From the moment of his creation, I knew that he had to fall. I hoped to find a way around it, but I wasn’t able to. The problem, Detective Decker, was power and will. I needed Samael to be the Lightbringer. I created him, along with his twin Michael, to do the heavy lifting in the creation of the earth. I said, ‘let there be light,' and Samael made the light. I gave Michael the power to create raw matter, and I gave Samael the will to shape it. Michael, bless him, was content with his power, but to give one of my angels the creativity to shape the Grand Canyon and create the right conditions for a sunset, I needed to add a little extra. Of all my children, Samael is the most like me… an artist, a creator. He had to be to complete his task.”

“And, because the two of you were so similar, you butted heads?”

God nodded. “Samael wanted his freedom. He wanted the ability to make his own decisions. He didn’t like being told what to do.”

“He hasn’t changed," Chloe said, her face breaking into a grin.

God laughed. “He listens to you better than he ever listened to me.”

Chloe collapsed back in laughter. “I almost pity you. Getting him to behave is like trying to wrestle a tiger. The best you can hope for is to point him in the right direction and hope that no one loses an arm.” Her giggles subsided, as she remembered that she was sitting with the being who caused her partner so much pain. “Why did you send him to Hell?”

God sat at the other end of the couch. “He wasn’t happy here, living under my thumb.”

She raised an eyebrow. “And you thought Hell was a better choice?”

“I gave him too much of myself. He couldn’t follow. It wasn’t in his nature. Hell was my only option and he was needed there. Aside from myself and Samael’s mother…”

“You have a wife?”

“Ex-wife. It’s a long story.”

“But why isn’t she mentioned…”

“...in the Bible? Misogyny. As I said, it’s a long story and it isn’t relevant.” God waived it off. “As I was saying, aside from myself and Samael’s mother, your partner is the most powerful being to ever exist. I couldn’t have that much power roaming unrestrained on Earth. I didn’t like sending him to Hell, but at the time, I couldn’t see another option. So, of course, Samael found door number three.”

“Of course he did,” Chloe muttered.

“Indeed. He started coming to Earth. Even I couldn’t figure out how he was doing it at first. But, much to my surprise, he seemed mostly interested in burying himself in human flesh and inspiring artists through his favors.”

“That sounds like Lucifer.”

God smiled. “And then I found my own third option. You.” God nudged Chloe’s leg. “You could teach him. Make him grow. Become more than he was. You can fix things that are outside of my control, and maybe even heal the wounds that I inflicted.”

“So the whole ‘miracle’ thing is true?”

“My son doesn’t lie. He gets that from me.”

“But I failed.”

“No, Chloe Decker, you did exactly what you were supposed to do.”

“Betray him?”

“You taught him to forgive.”

Chloe leapt from the couch, and oh, how she wished she could bring hellfire to her eyes at that moment. “You did send that priest to find me!”

“I did.”

“You ASSHOLE! Lucifer was right! You were willing to damn me so that, what, you could give Lucifer a test run on forgiveness, so that maybe someday he could forgive you?”

“Yes.”

_“Dick!”_

“I deserve your anger.”

“Damn right, you do. I’m DEAD! My daughter has lost me, and I’m going to Hell just so that you could manipulate your son into forgiving you!”

“Ah, about that. You’re not quite dead yet.”

Chloe blinked. “No, I was there. I’m pretty sure that I’m dead.”

“Do you want to be dead?”

“No.”

“Then sit, Detective Decker. And listen.” Chloe plopped gracelessly back to the couch. “Souls choose what happens to them. Heaven or Hell. It’s entirely up to you. I can’t take that choice away from you. But I can give you a third option.”

“What’s that?”

“Divinity,” God said, as if that was an explanation for everything.

“Explain,” Chloe said, lost.

“I’d like to give you wings, Detective Decker. I’d like to send you back to Earth with my son. The two of you may remain on Earth to watch your daughter grow. I can enlist some of my other children to keep an eye on Hell and keep the demons in line for a few decades. When Beatrice passes, however, you would remain partnered with my son. You would help him rule Hell. Maybe even make it a bit more fair. More just. And, just as Lucifer is able to pass between realms, you would have that ability as well. You could visit Earth, you could even visit your family here in Heaven. And hopefully someday, you can fix my mistakes and bring my son home to me.”

Chloe’s jaw dropped. “You want to make me an angel?”

“Yes.”

“So that I can, what, become the Queen of Hell?”

“Yes.”

“And play mediator between God and the Devil?”

“Yes.”

Chloe blinked twice. _How is this my life?_ “I’m tremendously underqualified for that.”

“I disagree.”

“You couldn’t just send me back as a human?”

“I could, but I won’t.”

“Why?”

“I've had a plan for you for a long time, Chloe Decker, and you being alive and human won't achieve my goals."

"What about my goals?"

"Hopefully, our goals will be the same with time. If you choose to remain dead and go to Hell, my son will learn a lesson about what happens if he blames others for his own mistakes, which Doctor Linda Martin will teach him in time. If you choose Heaven, he will come looking for you, eventually coming home. If you choose divinity, he will have you by his side, teaching him, making him better and bringing him joy. Simply returning you as a human gives me none of the desired results. And, Detective Decker? You did a great injustice to my son…”

“...an injustice you encouraged…”

God nodded. “Regardless, you would have gone to Hell tonight if my son and I had not intervened. Returning you as a human would be your ideal choice, and you’re not getting it, because you do deserve punishment for your actions. I didn’t make you listen to the priest, I just put him in front of you, and now you’ll pay for it. None of the three choices I have given you will be without punishment. None of them will be easy. All will bring you pain. But some may also bring you joy. You simply get to choose which punishment you prefer.”

“Lucifer’s right. You are a manipulative bastard.” God didn’t deny it. Chloe sat back in silence, deep in thought. "And the only reason you want me to become angel is so you can mend fences with your son?"

"I may have one or two other motivations, but repairing my relationship to Lucifer is certainly important to me.“

Chloe gazed off into the distance. This was too big for her. She needed help. "I don’t want to make this decision by myself. This affects Lucifer too.”

“You are the only one who can decide the fate of your soul, Detective Decker. You need to make a choice.” God got up from the couch. “I’ll leave you for a moment to think, but we don’t have long. Your body is waiting for you on Earth, and even I can only keep power going to it for a short time.”

Chloe gazed off into the distance, contemplating her… life? Afterlife? She didn’t even notice when God left the room. Or when another person arrived.

“Hello, monkey.”

And, at that moment, Chloe didn’t feel like a recently deceased 39 year old woman weighed down by a decision that would change the course of her existence. She was a girl again, and that voice promised safety.

_“Daddy!”_

*****

Lucifer shook with rage as his father finished telling him of the choice that Chloe was contemplating. “You bastard! How dare you rope her into your games?”

“She was made for this, Samael.”

“You created this perfect beautiful soul, just to force her to make a terrible choice, and if she chooses wrong, an eternity of Hell, either as punisher or punished! SHE DESERVES HEAVEN!”

“She deserves a chance to make her own choice. As do you.”

Lucifer scoffed and turned away. “Angels don’t get a choice, though, do they, Dad? You made us to follow. You made us to obey.”

“I made angels that way, yes. It’s in their very nature. But not archangels. I needed you to be more.”

“Michael…”

“You and Michael are two sides of the same coin. Two sides of me. Michael is the head: steady and true. You are the heart: volatile, unpredictable, passionate. Michael is content to rule Heaven beside me. You, however, needed your own realm. And maybe, by the time the sun rises on Earth tomorrow, you will have a queen by your side. You are the Lightbringer. You brought light to the sky, you bring light to the people you’ve chosen to have in your life on Earth. Why don’t you think you could bring light to Hell?”

Lucifer’s jaw dropped open in shock. “Because it’s Hell.”

God smiled at his son. “Does it have to be?”

Lucifer was shaken from his slack-jawed contemplation of his father by the arrival of Chloe and John, walking through Heaven’s gates, arm in arm. Her eyes immediately sought out Lucifer’s. When she found him, a grin broke across her face. “Lucifer.”

Lucifer felt like he was falling again from the gates of Heaven. Her beautiful blue eyes, which he wondered if he’d ever see again, caught him before he could crash. “Detective,” he whispered, awe in his voice. “Are you okay?”

Chloe nodded. “I will be.”

Lucifer let out a sign of relief. “You’re choosing to remain with your father.”

Chloe felt hurt wash over her. “You don’t want me with you?”

Lucifer shook his head. “I want you to be happy and free. I don’t want you to have to go to Hell.”

John squeezed Chloe’s arm. “Tell him, monkey.” Chloe looked at her father, tears in her eyes.

“Trixie,” she whispered. “If I go back, I get to raise Trixie.”

“But, after she’s gone…”

John locked eyes with the Devil. “I would give anything to have been by my daughter’s side as she grew up.”

“I don’t want Trixie to know the pain of losing a parent,” Chloe said.

“Detective, did my father mention that he wanted you to rule Hell? With me? That he wants to change you?”

Chloe gave Lucifer a wry smile. “I can think of worse fates. If you don’t want me in your life, tell me now. It’s not too late to change my mind.”

Lucifer gazed into her eyes, feeling both hopeful and selfish. “You’ll be in Hell. I don’t want you to suffer like I have.”

Chloe smiled at him. “Then we won’t suffer.”

“It’s Hell.”

“I know. Maybe we can make it better.”

“Don’t you think I’ve tried?” He yelled. “That place takes everything good and turns it to ash!”

“No, it hasn’t.”

“Oh, so suddenly you’re the expert?”

Chloe put a hand on his cheek, bringing his eyes to hers. “It didn’t destroy you. You’re still good. And it won’t destroy me. Do you want me by your side?”

Lucifer wanted it. Oh, did he want it. But he wouldn't trade his happiness for her own. "Detective, the choice is yours. What I want is irrelevant."

"True," Chloe shrugged, "But I'd like my partner's opinion"

He put his hand on her cheek. "Do what will make you happy." She smiled at him, holding onto his hand.

"Okay." She turned to her father, looking for confirmation. He gave her a sad smile and a nod.

Chloe looked God in the eye. "Give me wings."

God waiver Azrael over to him. "Daughter, go retrieve Detective Decker's body." Azrael nodded and disappeared.

Emotions crashed over Lucifer, some happy, and some sad. His grip on her hand tightened and she turned back to him. "Are you okay?" she asked him.

Lucifer shook his head. "I'm not sure yet."

"Me neither."

The Angel of Death reappeared, holding Chloe's body. She sat it down at her father's feet on its side, the face towards Chloe. "This is so strange. Do I really look like that?"

"Absolutely gorgeous? Of course," Lucifer said, with absolute confidence. Chloe rolled her eyes at him, a smile on her face.

"You look more beautiful than you did in that ridiculous movie, monkey," John said, taking Chloe's other hand.

Chloe's jaw dropped. "You said you liked my work!"

John laughed at his daughter's expense. "I liked your later work better. I thought you particularly excelled in both the roles of Detective and Mother. You’ve even managed to keep the Devil in line."

"Excuse me? She does NOT keep me in line." Lucifer said, offended.

Chloe laughed. "He's right, Dad. Trying to keep Lucifer in line is like…"

"...trying to bottle lightning," God cut in. "Detective Decker, are you ready?"

Chloe's levity faded away as the reality of her very weird situation came crashing back to her. She walked away from her father and Lucifer and stood before God. "I am," she said, proud that her voice didn't waver.

"Changing your body would be incredibly painful for you. I'll wait to put your soul back until I've finished."

"Thank you."

"Don't thank him," Lucifer grumbled. Chloe looked over her shoulder and glared at him. _Behave,_ she mouthed.

God held one hand over the body of Chloe Jane Decker. "Samael, your mother and I created the seeds for all the angels a long time ago. As you grew stronger, you grew unhappy here in the Silver City, so your mother and I made one last angel. One meant to be a companion to you. We were naive when we created her though. She wouldn't have been enough to calm you. Over time, as I've watched your struggles in Hell, and your vacations to Earth, I realized that she couldn't be just another angel. Nothing so simple would be enough for you. I've tweaked her, making her brighter, stronger. I gave her compassion and wisdom. I changed her from a sister to something more. I gave her free will. I gave her fire. And when the time was right, I gave a child to Penelope and John Decker. I put the angel's soul inside." God's hands began to glow as they traced over the body. "Chloe, you've always had the divine spark, all I ever needed to do was activate it." The glow left God's hands and encompassed the body.

She watched in awe as the small scars that decorated the hands faded as the light passed. Fine lines at the corners of the mouth and eyes disappeared. The glow from the rest of the body faded and concentrated behind the shoulder blades. It glowed, bright as the sun, then two brilliant wings burst from the back.

The feathers were yellow at the base, shifting to orange, then a vibrant red at the tips, making them look like a perfect sunset.

"Chloe, like the phoenix rising from the ashes, it is time for you to be remade." God took one of the body's hands and held his other out to Chloe.

She hesitated. "Is that me?"

"It will be."

She looked behind her, searching for Lucifer. He walked forward taking her hand. "I'm right here. It will be okay. Just a bit more, then you can go home and see the urchin."

"I'm scared," she whispered to him.

He gave a sad smile and tightened his grip on her hand.

"Go ahead, monkey. It's time for you to go home. You need to give Trixie a hug from her grandpa," John said, giving her shoulder a squeeze.

Okay, Chloe thought. I can do this.

Chloe walked away from the two men she loved and put her hand in God's. The moment her hand touched his, she felt as if she split into a million pieces. Everything that made her her suddenly burst apart. Bits and pieces of… something… something extra began to cling to her. It was like the brightest light and the hottest fire was searing itself to her soul. But she didn’t burn. She glowed.

Chloe felt huge. Too big to be contained, too big to be real. She heard a voice coming to her in a language that definitely wasn’t English. It sounded like bells and starlight and children’s laughter all rolled up into two sentences. “You’ve done so well, Chloe Decker. You have my gratitude.”

A force pulled at her being, bringing the pieces back together and channeling them down, containing them. Her soul connected with her body with a thud. For a second, she was in a body that was still. No heartbeat, no breath, no movement. Panic flooded her until her body suddenly sprang back to life. Her heart thudded first, then air filled her lungs, then her muscles kicked in and she curled in on herself. Nerves in her back received a jolt, and she could suddenly feel her wings. She curled them against her back and then flared them out, pleasantly surprised to know that she could feel them and move them like any other limb.

She was still then, basking in the feel of the new power thrumming through her veins.

The most beautiful voice sounded in her ears. “Detective?”

The Queen of Hell opened her glowing red eyes.


	6. Returned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe and Lucifer go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took an extra day because I kind of didn't want this project to end. I hard core procrastinated writing the last page

Lucifer was kneeling beside Chloe when her eyes opened. The hellfire in her eyes startled him. He shot a panicked look towards his father. “Teach her how to appear human, Samael. Then take her home to her daughter.”

“Lucifer, is everything okay? Do I look okay?”

His eyes returned to hers. He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ears. “You look lovely. We’ll just have to work on making you presentable to humans before we go home.”

“What’s wrong with me?”

“Nothing is wrong with you. But you do have wings. That would scare the humans.”

 _And I’m not. Human. Not anymore,_ she thought. Chloe sat up and brought one of the wings around so that she could reach it. She gave a shocked little giggle as she buried her hand in her feathers. “That feels so strange.” Chloe fanned the wing out to her side, watching the light reflect off the multicolored feathers. “They’re pretty.”

“Indeed. But first, let’s work on your eyes.”

“What’s wrong with my eyes?”

In response, Lucifer let his eyes momentarily flash to red.

 _“My eyes are RED?”_ With her panic, the flames in her eyes brightened.

“Awww, that’s cute! They match!” Azrael giggled. Chloe’s red-eyed gaze snapped to Azrael and Amenadiel. She’d forgotten they were even there.

“Azrael, Amenadiel. I believe you both have places you need to be,” God said. 

“Smell ya later, Chloe!” Azrael waved as she opened her wings and took off.

“I’ll come down and visit soon, Luci. Chloe, glad you’re okay.” Amenadiel nodded and flew off after his sister.

“John Decker?” God said, “It’s time.”

John walked up to his daughter, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “My winged monkey. Like in the Wizard of Oz.” Chloe giggled. “You’re beautiful, Chloe.”

“Daddy…”

“Shhh,” he whispered, wrapping her in a hug. “This isn’t goodbye. You can come and visit me any time. But Trixie needs you right now, okay?”

Chloe’s eyes closed, a tear falling down her cheek. “I love you, Daddy.”

“I love you. And call your mother. I know she’s… well… your mother, but she misses you too.” Chloe giggled. He pressed another kiss to her forehead before turning to Lucifer, his expression turning stern. “Keep an eye on my girls, Lucifer.” John Decker turned, going back through the gates of Heaven. Only God was left.

“Your lives are your own to live as you chose as long as your daughter lives. I’ll have angels guarding the gates of Hell so that you may live in peace. But you should probably take your Queen on a tour of her realm sooner rather than later. We’ll speak soon. Detective Decker, you’re welcome to come visit your father whenever you please.”

“As for me?” Lucifer asked

“Your ban is still in place, for now. We’ll discuss it later, Lucifer.”

“You used my name.” Lucifer said, shocked.

God shrugged. “You seem to prefer it.” And, with that, God walked through the gates. They slid closed behind him.

Chloe and Lucifer stood side by side, the silence between them growing. “Lucifer…” Chloe finally whispered.

He whipped towards her, a slightly manic smile on his face. “Let’s take care of those eyes and get you home.”

“Do you want to talk about what just happened?”

“Now the key to controlling them is to remember they’re tied to your emotions. I’m sure you’re feeling rather keyed up right now…”

“We need to…”

“...so let’s take a few deep breaths, and see if we can find your blue eyes again.”

She sighed, rolling her eyes at him.

“Come on, Detective. In through your nose, out through your mouth.”

Chloe let out an irritated huff.

Lucifer frowned. “Don’t be stubborn. You can do better than that.”

“You irritate me,” she grumbled.

“Maybe you should have thought about that before you volunteered to run Hell by my side for an eternity,” he said, a note of anger in his voice. Then his mask of forced joy returned. “Well! We’ve got 100 years before we need to worry about that, give or take. Let’s fix your eyes.”

Chloe reared back, shocked “Lucifer, are you… are you mad at me?”

Chloe knew the look that flashed across his face. It was the look he gave when he didn’t want to lie, right before he gave a Lucifer version of the truth. “I want to go home, Detective. I don’t like it here.”

Chloe’s breath caught. She’d been so wrapped up with her own mess, she hadn’t even thought about what Lucifer must have been going through. “Is this where you were when you…”

“Yes.”

She sighed in resignation. “In through my nose, out through my mouth?” 

Lucifer nodded, taking her face between his hands. As Chloe took her first deep breath, he said “Very good, Detective. Again.”

“Are they still red?” 

Lucifer nodded. Chloe took another breath. Then another. She felt herself calming. Suddenly Lucifer broke into a grin. “There’s your lovely eyes, Detective.”

“They’re blue?”

“They are. You should probably practice with them so they don’t pop out and scare the douche. Until you’ve got it down, just remember to stay calm.”

“Okay, so what about…” Chloe waved a wing towards him.

“Even easier,” Lucifer said. “Just keep pulling them closer to your body. When you feel like you’ve got them as close as they’ll go, just give one last push.”

And, simple as that, her wings disappeared. She twisted around to look at her back. “They went through my clothes?”

“Mmm,” Lucifer nodded. “Mine do the same.” He manifested his wings and turned his back to Chloe.

“How?”

Lucifer shrugged, turning back towards her. “Amenadiel tried to explain it to me a year or so ago. Apparently human scientists stumbled upon the basics of how it all worked. Something about a dead cat in a box. Ask him.”

“Angel magic?”

“That’s as good an explanation as any.”

Chloe gave a little wiggle. “I can feel them in there. It’s strange.” She rolled her shoulders, and the wings came out again. Chloe gave a happy sigh of relief.

“It feels better for you? To have them out?”

Chloe nodded. “It’s itchy keeping them in.” She fanned the wings out above her head, stretching her new muscles. “Does it bother you to keep yours in all the time?”

Lucifer shrugged. “Doctor Martin says I have a complex emotional relationship with my wings.”

Chloe gave a little gasp. “Your scars…”

“I cut them off,” he said suddenly. “I couldn’t return to Hell while I had them. And I never wanted to go back. And now we both have to go there.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and glanced back towards the gates of Heaven. “Detective, I came here, to a place I despise, to plead with a father I hate to get you into Heaven. And you threw it away.”

“I couldn’t leave Trixie. And, I thought, with enough time, maybe we could… I don’t know. Maybe we could like each other again?”

As Lucifer turned back towards her, she caught a brief flash of red in his eyes. “I wasn’t lying when I said I forgave you, Detective. I’m just not sure that I trust you right now.”

Chloe looked away, a tear threatening to fall from her eyes. “That’s fair,” she said. “I wasn’t lying when I said that I loved you, either. I have for a long time.”

“And I, you, Detective. For a long time.”

As far as love declarations from Lucifer went, it certainly wasn’t the one Chloe had occasionally allowed herself to fantasize about. There was no wide eyed innocent joy of newfound love and companionship. Just a statement of fact. It felt almost impersonal. Neither of them were even looking at the other.

“So where does that leave us?” Chloe finally managed to choke out.

Lucifer let out a large sigh and suddenly bounced back to his usual self like he had flipped a switch. “It leaves us standing at the gates of Heaven, blubbering like idiots, when we should really be getting home. Come, Detective, let’s fly.” He flashed a brilliant smile at her, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

*****

They landed at the hill overlooking the city that had seen the end of Charlotte’s life and Chloe’s mortality. “How is it still dark?” Chloe asked, folding her wings away. “We were up there for hours.”

Lucifer folded his as well. “Time moves differently on Earth than it does in Heaven or Hell.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket and checked the time. “We were only gone for about 10 minutes.”

How could her whole life change in only 10 minutes? Chloe’s eyes scanned the hilltop. “Kinley’s body is gone.”

“I’d imagine that my sister took care of it when she came to retrieve your body.” Lucifer knelt down to examine the dirt at his feet.

“Is that blood?” Chloe asked.

Lucifer reached one finger towards the red stain on the ground. “Yours,” he said. “I thought I’d never see you again, Detective. I didn’t like it.”

“And now you can barely stand to look at me.”

Lucifer closed his eyes. “I liked you human.”

“I liked me human too, but apparently that option didn’t make your dad very happy.”

“Bastard.”

“Agreed,” she said. “He said this was my punishment, for what I did to you.”

“Guess a bullet to the chest wasn’t enough for him. Figures. I get a little too antsy about following his rules, and he throws me into Hell. You try and hurt the son he threw away and he tosses you in the pit with me.”

“He said I could find joy too, though.” Chloe paused, chewing on her lip. “Lucifer?” He looked towards her. “Do you think you can still like me? Now that I’m….”

“An angel?”

“Yeah.”

Lucifer stood then, cocking his head to the side. “May I see them again? Your wings.”

Chloe manifested her wings, giving a moan of relief to get the itchy things out of her back.

Lucifer laughed at her then. A real, genuine laugh. “You have to stop making orgasm noises every time you bring your wings out, Detective. You’re going to give me a wing kink.” She gave him a small grin and rolled her eyes. 

Lucifer walked around her, inspecting her wings from every angle. “They’re radiant, Detective. It’s like a sunset and fire all wrapped together.” He stood in front of her again and put her face in his hands. “Can you do the eyes again?”

Chloe furrowed her brow in concentration, trying to find the right mental headspace to make them glow red. Then she thought of Lucifer's dad shoving the priest at her and felt the shift this time. She had done it.

“You’re lovely, my Queen.”

Chloe gave a chuckle and felt her eyes shift back to blue. “Don’t think I’ll ever get used to that.”

“You’ve got time.”

“Yeah, I guess I do."

Lucifer's eyes flicked down to her right wing. "You've got a crooked feather," he said pointing to a spot about halfway down the wing.

"Oh," she said, raising the wing into view. "I thought something felt a bit off." 

"They do that sometimes," he said, contemplatively. "Flying will jar them. Or sometimes they get ruffled when you bring them in and out." His hand hovered, an inch above the wing. "May I show you how to fix it?"

Chloe nodded. 

Lucifer paused, suddenly nervous. "Don't touch another angel's wings without their permission. It's… personal." His hand still hovered, almost like he was afraid to touch them.

"Okay," she said. Her heart was beating faster, but she wasn't quite sure why. She felt the heat grow behind her eyes, and only just managed to keep them from turning red again.

Lucifer coughed. "You just, well…" he took a deep breath. "You flatten them down, from base to tip, so they lie flush with the others." His hand touched her wing. It felt like she was going to explode with sensation and her eyes burst into flames.

 _More!_ Her brain screamed for his hands to be buried in her feathers.

The sound that came out of her mouth must have been impressive because Lucifer's hand stilled on her wing. 

"Sorry," she said.

He coughed. "That's okay."

"I guess they're pretty sensitive."

"Quite."

He stepped away, putting his hands in his pockets. "Bloody Hell. I'm definitely developing a wing kink."

"Maybe I should just…" she pointed behind her shoulders.

"Yes " Lucifer cleared his throat. "Probably for the best."

"Yeah," she said, folding her wings away.

Lucifer continued to stare at her.

"What?"

"Eyes, Detective."

"Oh." Chloe put the fire out.

Lucifer gave a small smile. "There you go. You look positively human."

Chloe gazed out at the city that was her home, filled with 4 million humans.

And two angels. 

"But I'm not."

"No. But if it's any consolation to you, I don't think you were ever entirely human."

"Not helping, Lucifer."

"Apologies, Detective."

She shook her head, resignation settling into her stomach. "Nothing to be done about it now. Can I give you a ride home?"

"Please." 

Chloe reached for her keys, but they weren't there. Her brain frantically went back to hours earlier, or, really only 10 minutes ago, to when she last had her keys. It felt like looking back to another life. "You had my keys last."

“I left them locked in the car.” He pushed past her and opened the door, motioning for her to step inside with a flourish.

“Will you finally tell me how you manage to unlock everything without a key?”

“Angel magic,” he said with a grin.

Chloe sat down in her car, suddenly shocked by how normal it was. Her coffee cup from the morning still rested in the cup holder. Files from the case she’d closed that evening were shoved between her seat and the center console. Trixie’s jacket rested on the backseat. Little hints to what her life had been. Boring and ordinary, for the most part, except for her Devilish partner. And she’d been perfectly fine with that: simple pleasures with an occasional splash of Lucifer-induced insanity. Sitting down in her car felt like putting on an old comfy sweatshirt on at the end of a long day.

She put her left hand on the steering wheel, and the illusion of “normal” vanished. She’d had a scar on the back of her hand. It was from one of her first cases as a rookie. She’d had to break a window out in a car to rescue a person overdosing inside. She’d been stupid about it. Instead of taking a second to look where she stuck her hand, she reached straight inside, slicing the back of her hand on a broken piece of glass. It took three stitches to close the wound. It hadn’t left a large scar, but it had remained as a constant visual reminder to slow down, and to think before she acted.

The scar was gone now.

She reached below the collar of her shirt. There were no marks, either from Kinley’s bullet, or from Jimmy Barnes’. Chloe frantically lifted her shirt and pulled at the waistband of her pants.

No stretch marks.

“Detective?” Lucifer asked from the passenger seat, a note of concern in his voice.

“My stretch marks are gone!” She gasped in panic.

“Okay…”

“No! You don’t understand! Trixie gave me those stretch marks!”

“I thought most women would be thrilled to get rid of those.”

“They were proof that I carried her! They were proof that she was MINE! Proof that my body grew her, sustained her and gave her life. You don’t understand, Lucifer. After that stupid movie, my body wasn’t mine anymore. It was perfect and it belonged to everyone else. My stretch marks made me _not_ perfect. They made me more than the woman who took her top off for a movie.” She felt her eyes flair to red. “Lucifer, this body didn’t give Trixie life. It’s not mine anymore”

“Chloe, look at me.” Chloe continued to gasp. He took her face between his hands and turned her red eyed, panicked gaze towards him. “I understand, Chloe, better than you think. Why do you think I cut off my wings?”

She took a breath in through her teeth. “Because they weren’t yours?”

Lucifer nodded. “And then they grew back. I cut them off again and again, but they still kept coming back.” He stroked a tear away from her cheek. “Eventually I came to peace with them. I used them in the way _I_ wanted to, not my father. I made them my own. It will take time, but you’ll get there.”

Chloe let out a breath, the adrenaline left her system and her eyes turned back to blue.

“You threw away your chance at Heaven, Chloe. And you did it for your daughter. You did it so that she could be raised by a mother who loved her, instead of sticking her with the douche for the rest of her life. Chloe, your wings are a gift to Beatrice. They are something that you will carry with you for eternity: a physical representation of the love you have for your child.”

She gave him a slightly watery grin. “Thank you, Lucifer.”

“Now budge over, you’re in no condition to drive. I’ll take you home.”

*****

Chloe let her mind drift as she watched the lights of LA flicker past the window of her car. She could feel Lucifer gazing at her from time to time. He wanted to say something, she could tell. But she wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to hear it.

Eventually he worked up the nerve and cleared his throat, shaking her from her contemplation of the LA skyline. “We’ll have to tell Maze what happened tonight.”

“Why?” 

“She’ll be able to smell the divinity on you. It’s likely to surprise her, and Maze has a tendency to place pointy objects in things that surprise her.”

“Good point.”

Lucifer pulled out his phone, dialing Maze’s number. 

“I was asleep, you asshole.”

“Apologies, Mazikeen. I wanted to make you aware of a situation with your roommate. She’s an angel now, and my father made her the Queen of Hell. So don’t stab her when you see her.”

“Wait, what?”

“I’ll let you get back to your slumbers. Goodnight, Mazikeen.”

“Lucifer!”

He hung up the phone, only for it to ring a second later. He put it on silent. Then Chloe’s phone rang. 

Chloe sighed and picked it up.

“WHAT THE FUCK, DECKER?”

“I’m on my way home. I’ll talk to you when I get there.”

“DECKER!”

“I’ll see you soon.” Chloe hung up.

“I’m afraid you’ll have a pissed off demon waiting for you when you arrive home.”

Chloe gave a little chuckle. “Just another Tuesday.”

“Well, technically it’s Wednesday now.”

Chloe gave a little “Mmmm,” and shifted her gaze out the window again.

A few more minutes passed in quiet.

“Detective?"

"Yeah."

"I'd like to ask you a favor."

"Okay."

Lucifer paused. “Can I tell Dr. Martin?

Chloe’s brow furrowed. The truth was, she didn’t want _anyone_ to know. Somehow that would make it all more real. It was bad enough that Maze had to know apparently. But she’d put Lucifer through so much in the past few hours. Of course he would need to unpack it all. “Yeah. I think that’s a good idea. You’ve had a weird day.”

Lucifer gave a little chuckle. “Indeed. What would you like in return?”

“What do you mean?”

“You granted me a favor.”

“What, like repayment?”

“You really don’t get how this whole ‘deal with the Devil’ thing works, do you?”

Chloe looked at him. Really looked at him. And she didn’t see the Devil. “I know it’s been a weird day. And, I know that I started the day out with some really, really bad decisions. But you’re not.”

“Not what?”

“Not the Devil. Not to me.”

Lucifer’s hand tensed on the steering wheel. “Don’t, Chloe. Please.”

“Don’t what?”

“I just can’t. I can’t go there with you right now.”

“Lucifer, I’m…”

“And I don’t want to hear that you’re sorry! A few hours ago, you tried to have me sent back to Hell, and now you want to, what? Hop into bed with me?”

Chloe’s jaw dropped, tears springing to her eyes. Again. For about the 50th time tonight.

“Chloe, I love you. I do. And I have forgiven you. But, I just can’t. I can’t open myself up to you, not like that.”

She blinked, and turned towards the window. She’d broken his trust. She’d lied to him. And now, now that she was finally ready, now that she wanted nothing more that the comfort of his arms, and to comfort him in turn, now she’d ruined it

“I understand,” she said, in barely more than a whisper. So this was truly her fate. Condemned to spend eternity with someone who didn’t trust her.

Lucifer pulled into Chloe’s parking spot and turned off the car, handing her the keys. “I’m going to help you get through this, Detective.” He pointed vaguely towards her back. “And I would like it if we could remain... “ He stopped, his throat closing up.

“Partners?” She tentatively suggested.

Lucifer nodded.

“Okay.” She got out of the car, Lucifer right behind her. “Do you want me to order you an Uber?”

“I’ll fly.”

“Okay.” 

They stood, awkwardly, not quite looking at each other. Lucifer was the one to finally break the silence. “Well, goodnight, Detective,” he said, turning to leave.

“Lucifer,” she said. He turned back towards her. “Will you be at work tomorrow?”

He nodded. 

“Okay,” she said, feeling a tiny bit of relief. “Goodnight, Lucifer.”

“Sleep well.” He opened his gleaming white wings and was gone in an instant.

Chloe walked up the path to her house, a thousand emotions pulling her in different directions. She unlocked the door with her now scar-free hand and walked inside. She just wanted to drink and be numb. And probably spend all night staring at her ceiling, unable to sleep. Chloe walked into her kitchen, pulling a bottle of wine out of the fridge.

As she shut the door, she was shocked to see a demon standing next to her.

“Granny Panties Decker is the new Queen of Hell? You’ve got to be shitting me.” Maze burst into laughter. “You’re going to need something stronger than wine.” She handed Chloe a bottle of vodka, grinning from ear to ear. “Cheers, your majesty.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your kudos and comments on my first ever fic! I've got a rough outline for a larger fic in my brain spinning off this story, and a solid outline for at least three more chapters. But, since this is my first fic, I'd like your opinion. Which would be better? Making this part one of a series, or adding a question mark for the end chapter of this one? If I just continue this story, I'm afraid the next chapter would be a bit recap-y. Quarantine restrictions are being lifted soon in my area, so updating every couple of days probably won't be possible after next week, but, on the bright side, I'll be getting a paycheck. Thank you again for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic! I'd love comments and suggestions. Thank you!


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